A Choice Every Day

Thank you all for your wonderful comments... Lara really hit it on the head, though. Marriage is a choice you make every day. Even when choices are difficult.
Right now I choose to remain married, I choose to nurture this relationship. Right now I choose to take the bad with the good, even if the bad seems prevalent right now.
It will either get better or it will get worse, and while there are certainly things that I won't tolerate I am willing to wait this one out.
I think that my angst recently has centered around the fact that I thought I had a pretty good handle on relationships in general - my relationship specifically. Recent conversations with my husband have made me see that we have two very different ideas about what our relationship is like and where it is going.
Something that you'd think we would have figured out a long time ago.
Apparently since his dad died everything has shifted for him. Priorities or expectations or what he needs. I honestly don't have any idea what that means for us. He is not looking for a way out. He is perfectly content to let things go on as they are. And he really doesn't want to talk about it. Or the job search. Or anything.
So that leaves me to figure out what kind of "normal" we have now and how to navigate it.
Today I choose us... who knows what will happen tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow.