No More Germs!!

I got my hair done today - I'm red again! Hallelujah!! My new hairstylist wasn't sure about the color I picked. She was leaning a little more to the copper/orange family and I was all about the violets. I know. You're all shocked. There was an honest to Bob purple and I thought about it for just a minute and then moved on. I am really pleased with how it turned out. It's a weave (or "low-lights") so it's not all over color. It's just enough to be shiny. And red.

And then I had to go home. To the sick people. Ugh.
Bean has a cold and the husband has some kind of stomach thing. And that's all I'm going to say about that.

I walked in the door and rather than a chorus of, "Oh your hair looks so great! It makes you look so young and thin!" I was bombarded with whining and neediness. I made chicken soup. Because, apparently they were both too weak to pop the top on the can and operate the microwave on their own. I refilled water and juice, distributed cold medicine and Pepto, and then I rubbed about a quart of antibacterial gel all over my body. I have also taken to wandering through the house with a box of Lysol wipes wiping down everything that will hold still.

Neither of them are allowed anywhere near my inner sanctum (the bedroom) tonight.

Tomorrow is Stitch and Bitch at my LYS and I'm not missing it. (And I promise not to bring the germs with me). I am about half way through my Clapotis and I love it very much. I am going to make it longer than it's supposed to be... I just need to figure out what I'm going to wear under it. You know, besides everything! My favorite part? Dropping the stitches and letting it unravel down. Normally this is a very bad thing in knitting. In the Clapotis it's design. Nice. It speaks to my inner destructiveness.

MONKEY SWAP 3!!!

I had such fun with Sockapalooza that I decided to join another swap!!

Monkey Sock Swap THREE
(Click to join!!)

The Basics:
Do you consider yourself a beginning sock knitter, an intermediate, or have you been doing this so long you could probably knit a pair in your sleep? I'm probably an intermediate

The measurements:
Shoe Size: 10
Foot circumference: 9 inches
Foot length: 10 inches

Yarn Preferences:
What colors do you love? Purples, blues and greens... but I also love pink!
Do you prefer solids or variegated? Either
Do you prefer wool, cotton or acrylic yarn? No real preference but I do like washable yarns
What colors would you never wear? orange and yellow
What are your favorite brands of yarn? Blue Moon, Crystal Palace (especially Bamboo Cotton) and Knit Picks Rissata
Are there any new brands you would like to try? Nothing that comes to mind...

Cookie A. Patterns:
Which of her patterns have you already knit? None!!
Which pattern(s) would you like to knit and don’t already own? Millicent

Other pertinent information:

Would you be willing to have an international Monkey Pal or do you prefer one in the US? International is fine
Do you have any allergies? Nope
Will your knitting be exposed to smoke or animals? Cats
Are you on Ravelry yet? Yes!
If you don’t mind having new friends, what is your Ravelry name? Jillo

Happy Birthday Isaac

It's my youngest nephew's first birthday today. It was a series of events that culminated at his birth that caused my sister to confront me and then refuse to speak to me.
As my sister and I are still not speaking I have held him four times: the night he was born, my mother's birthday dinner, Easter and Ian's birthday.
I hate this.
I am still angry at her for a lot of things and she is (clearly) still angry at me, but none of it means anything at all. She is my sister and I should be able to talk to her. Even if it's only on the polite family level. I should be able to say, "hey, we're going to the zoo, do you want to meet us there?" She should be able to say, "Hey, the kids are making me nuts can I come over for an hour?"
We don't have to resolve this, nobody has to be right or wrong. We don't even have to talk about it.
I have more contact - more friendly communication - with Bean's stepmother. The woman who was my best friend until she fell in love with my husband.
And that is just stupid.
I have spent the last year pretending that I am too busy to care about this. I have spent the last year adding up all of the times that I should have been able to rely on support from my sister and feeling really resentful. I have spent the last year offering up olive branches and waiting for her to respond. (And then feeling resentful). I have spent the last year denying that I am really really hurting because of this. There is not anything else I can do to fix this rift... and I can add up all of my resentments and categorize my anger and keep pretending, but if she called me tomorrow may walls would disintegrate like sandcastles.
If she weren't my sister we would never be friends and I know that we will never be as close as we used to be - if only because I would never be able to trust that she wouldn't freeze me out again at any time - but I would settle for talking about diaper rash.
So happy birthday, Isaac. I don't know if you're walking yet or if you like things that flash more than things that beep. I don't know if you like to be read to or if you would rather eat the book and have your toes tickled. Your present is in the mail.

Eating Hobbity

I'm not sure what the original diet consisted of... mostly whole grains and walnuts and vegetables and a lot of water. There was a schedule to it, and also measuring. I don't know. It's some sort of "detoxifying" diet that Andie found that is supposed to help you kick-start healthier eating habits following a McDonalds and/or pledge-drive-induced Krispy Kreme splurge. I guess it worked... I never really tried it. It also involved a lot of Salmon and I am not really all that fond of fish. A co-worker accused her of eating like a Hobbit. And I guess she was - there were all of these little snacks that she would pack away and nibble on throughout the day. Really, from what I understand, a quite healthy way to approach food.
"Eating Hobbity" has transformed over the years to mean planning out a nutrition-focused breakfast and/or lunch rather than eating out or microwaving a Lean Cuisine. It usually involves this revolting-looking (but really yummy) yogurt concoction that Andie and I have been revising and personalizing. It is filling and healthy and (can be) low calorie and low fat. The "original" is sugar free, fat free yogurt with Fiber One. In Weight Watchers it's one point and it's filling. The newest incarnation involves Kashi, walnuts and dried cranberries. Seriously? It was amazing. I added up the calories and it's higher than you'd want for diet food, but much less (and much more nutritionally sound) than going to Wendy's. And it's been hours and I'm not at all hungry.
So today I'm Hobbity and it's all good.

Allergies Bad, Knitting Good

I am feeling sort of blank and sluggish today. My allergies are winning. The allergy medicine I'm taking seems to have no effect on anything but my sneezing and energy levels. My head is still full and my throat still hurts... and now I'm just exhausted. And a little stoned.

So I'm going to write about yarn now. No pictures, of course, just babbling.

My Blue Moon Fiber Arts order shipped (finally). I ordered some STR heavyweight - enough to make the Clapotis (I hope). I ordered it on the 10th and was starting to get frustrated by the fact that it was still "pending" and then I remembered that they are sending out sock club shipments last week and this week and maybe I should cut them a little slack! And also, I was thinking that maybe the Clapotis would be better out of the STR shipment from April - a sort of rainbow-colored silkie sock yarn.

Sigh.

I'm also working on a garter for Kerri's wedding and that is going well... It cemented my love for my friend Lara and the website Ravlery. I was having some problems with the pattern, so last week Lara went over the pattern and made some notes and was generally fabulous - I went home and knit through the first repeat with no problems at all. And then I was poking around on Ravelry and met another person who was working on it and she had lots of supportive things to say about it as well. There is no other place in my life where I feel this supported and understood. Is that sad or just really really cool?

And my LYS is having a monthly Lizard Ridge knit-along. I completed two squares last weekend and love it. I did one square just as the directions stated and on the second one I didn't switch yarns every 6 rows and while I like the way the first one looks best, they're both really pretty.

What else am I knitting... um... oh! My sweater! I have 5 whole inches!! Just another foot and I can start doing something besides knit the knits and purl the purls.

In non-knitting news, Andie and I are watching Lost on DVD. I had no idea this was such a cool freaking show! I avoided it because it sounded dumb and then by the time everyone and their cat was raving about it I figured it was too late to "get it." So we started by ordering the individual discs on Netflix but it was so good that one at a time was way too slow so we're speeding through the second season.
The cool thing about watching it this way is that we don't have to wait more than fifteen seconds for the next episode. The bad thing is that it is really difficult to avoid spoilers. I was poking around online today trying to figure out when season 3 would be available on DVD (December 11) and accidentally found out that one of my favorite characters dies. I'm really disappointed.

Knit on! I'll post pictures soon.

Sockapalooza Update: What I Sent

Alli has received and opened her package so I can post about it!!

This is the first thing she saw: a fabulous tote bag (with little pockets inside and everything!) that I got from StickChickSchwag on Etsy. I couldn't resist this cool bag!




And then I found these little Chinese food takeout containers at Hobby Lobby that were perfect for yarn and sock packing!










Here's what I packed inside: lace yarn from Knitpicks (Alli likes to knit lace) and the Crusoe socks in Chapman Springs from Blue Moon Fiber Arts.











I also sent a chart keeper from Knitpicks... something every lace knitter must have, right?!?











And finally, another view of the socks. She says they fit and she loves them. Yay me!


These really are my favorite socks to knit.

Back to School

Bean is back in school and all is right with the world. The first day of school I dropped her off at the bus stop and waited with her. Well, more accurately, I waited in the car and watched her. I asked her if she would be embarrassed if I waited with her and she said, "Well, sort of." So I got back in the car and slunk down and waited. As she got on the bus she put her hand down at hip level and fluttered a little inconspicuous wave in my general direction. I'll take what I can get as we enter this adolescence.

It's so weird... I have gone from being the mom who dropped her off at school and watched until she entered the building to being the mom who waits for her to come home from the bus stop. Instead of knowing where she is at all times I must now trust that she can walk two blocks without getting lost or kidnapped by dragons or joining a gang or smoking pot. This is practice for next year when she will be walking to school. She has made the transition beautifully and I am feeling a little superfluous.

I have always championed her independence, and her independence and maturity has made my life exponentially easier, but I sometimes wish she needed me a little more. But she is my child. I shouldn't expect anything different.

When they tell you that it goes by faster than you can imagine they're right. I feel like I was pregnant with her yesterday and today she's asking me if I want her to pack lunch for me while she's packing her own. Tomorrow she'll be married and having kids of her own. I should teach her how to bake brownies...

PS. Look what I ordered from Knit-Whit today!! I'm going to use it at Kerri's Bachelorette Sleepover!!

If I Admit I'm Stupid Will You Go Away??

I am apparently a huge file-erasing moron and there are people who are incredibly angry at me. I faced the music (well, the music producer whose files I lost) and said, "Look, I'm not entirely sure what happened but this file is gone and I am more sorry than I can even explain." He did not explode in his classic way, but he did get very icy. I don't blame him.

The engineer has found a way to try and recover what I lost and we'll know tomorrow if it worked or not. (Please let it work!! Please!!). I am feeling a lack of chocolate cake in my day.

Knitting tonight (bonus: it's at a bar, double bonus: it's at a bar with great burgers).

No Socks Yet

But I did get the coolest card from my sock pal... who has apparently just moved from Germany. If there is a better excuse for not finishing socks on time I would like to hear it!! When we moved last year it was less than a mile away and it turned our lives inside out. I can't imagine a transatlantic move. Wow.
It was cool to hear from her (I think it's a her anyway). I was starting to worry just a bit.

I did get my sock pal's package sent and she should get it tomorrow... yay! As soon as she has it I'll post pictures of what I sent. I wanted to send chocolate but, 107 degrees and chocolate don't work very well together!

I can't wait for sockapalooza 5!

Dear Elvis

(I sent The Yarn Harlot an email. About Twist and offering to show her around when she comes. As though she's going to write back and say "Sure possible stalker, I'd love to spend hours I could be sleeping or knitting or writing with you and your weird knitter friends." Um... I don't think it is the MOST delusional thing I've ever done. Close, though).

Here's the thing: I think that the bookstore owner, wonderful as she is, does not understand the needs of a traveling knitter. When Shelly talked to her about offering to help with the planning for the reading she apparently hedged a bit on whether they should have a reception at the yarn shop. I can totally understand that we don't want to make any assumptions about what She will or won't want to do other than the reading... but surely She would want to know about the LYS... or maybe not... But probably, right?

I just don't want Her to end up at the other store... the, um, decidedly less friendly one. And also there are some really good restaurants with vegetarian options that are so great... It's just that sometimes in this city you can look at it and only see McDonalds and Walmart. If you know where to look though, there are some really neat places to go.

I have to get over this.

Speaking of Twist, I had a fantastic time at the SNB last night. I have almost two whole inches on my sweater now. I might get it done before winter. Maybe. I also bought some more yarn (gasps all around, I know).

Movie tonight... and a very busy weekend ahead!

Not Sleeping...

And since there are no internets at my house I am at the office. At 4 am. I know.
I didn't just come up here to play online, I was almost asleep (for the tenth time) and then I remembered something I didn't do. Or... I thought there might have been something that I forgot to do but since I haven't been sleeping at all well I couldn't remember if I actually did it or just tried to remind myself to do it by not sleeping.
Or something like that.

It was actually done. There was officially no reason in the world for me to be here. At 4 am.

Soooooo. Not sleeping. That's not like me at all. It's more like me to sleep through the day into the next day. And the not sleeping has made my short-term memory act more like a sieve than a computer. Luckily, Bean and I went to the office supply store today (um, I guess, yesterday) and bought lots of pens and a new planner so I can write down everything I might forget. Unless I forget to. Or something like that. If you need me to do something it might be wise to watch me write it down. If I just nod at you - regardless of how enthusiastic I might seem - I will probably forget it, and maybe you, the minute you are out of my line of sight. And I keep double-booking myself. Not good.

Also yesterday (heat index 107 - fucking hell) Andie's husband fixed the air conditioning in my truck so now I can not pass out and melt to the steering wheel when I am supposed to be driving. He is my hero. After months of panting and sweating and trying not to die of heat stroke Bean actually accused me of trying to freeze her in the back seat. Yay!

We did get a nice thunderstorm last night. That's probably part of my non-sleeping problem. I would get comfortable and start to relax and then there would be another round of house-shaking thunder and the cats would fight (on me) over who got to try to climb under the covers with me. I voted for neither of them, but they were convinced that one of them should attach herself to me. It's funny though, neither of them usually even notices when we have storms. Strange.

I have a full day today... at least it's full of the things I remembered to write down... it includes babysitting for D, work, and a knit-and-dinner date with some friends. If I was supposed to do something for you and it's not on the list you might call me and remind me.

First day!

So my new job went well... there was me and my two co-workers and the security guard... oh, and the suicidal psychotic guy, the two city police officers, the sheriff's officer and the two EMS workers. Yup, it was a quiet night.
It was, actually. I got to knit and I got to know my new co-workers (and they like me, they really like me). I got invited to Bunco on Saturday... I think that's a good thing... and honestly, except for being suicidal and, you know, crazy and everything, the client was very nice as well. I still don't know exactly what I'm supposed to be doing, but I'm sure that will become clear in time.

My supervisor came in at one point (I was knitting) and said, "Oh! I crochet!" We spoke in the secret language of fibers, I made her touch my Berroco Comfort and I took the opportunity to tell her all about Twist. She was suitably impressed by Comfort and Twist. I have found people who understand me.

Bean and I start school next week and we are both excited. I'm excited to take the classes I've signed up for and she is excited about being the oldest class in the school. I'll be taking a class on diversity and the DSM-IV class. I will be able to diagnose all of the crazy people around me! Finally! The diversity class actually is bothering me a little bit because I looked at the syllabus and we have to talk about our "culture of origin." I don't have one of those. I don't know where my "people" came from - neither side of my family passed down any of those stories. From last names alone I can guess German and English, but I don't have any idea how long ago they showed up and I don't think that has influenced my life. We don't have "family recipes." I am seriously "just" an American. The meals that my grandmothers made all came from Betty Crocker, and hot dogs and burgers were our staples. And Jell-o. With Dream Whip.

What is it with Saturdays?!?

Here's how yesterday was supposed to go:

-Sleep in until 10
-Shower and dress
-Go to Twist for Grand Opening Celebration, win fabulous door prize, knit sweater
-Come home, make dinner, eat, clean kitchen
-Watch new Netflix (Eddie Izzard Definite Article and Lost, season 1, disc 1)
-Go to sleep early in preparation for day of working on Sunday

Here's how yesterday actually went:

-Get home at 12:30 am from Bourne Ultimatum feeling motion sick due to DP's apparent conviction that camera stabilizers are for pussies
-Wake at 11, feeling hung over from motion sickness
-Unload dishwasher in desperate search for clean glasses
-Discover that all glasses in house are dirty and distributed between Bean's room and the Man Den
-Load dishwasher
-Drink water from bowl out of desperation and great thirst
-Ignore odd looks from cats
-Shower and dress
-Fight with husband about antidepressants
-Decide that The Outside World is just better without me in it for today
-Cook and eat entire box of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese
-Hide in dark bedroom (with Netflix)
-Fall asleep during third episode of Lost and dream about being trapped on an island stocked with bottled water

I had Chinese food again today. I did not get a fortune cookie. I was afraid it would say something like, "Hey moron! What do we have to do, smack you with a frozen squid to get you to figure out we're talking to you? Leave the idiot and move the hell on!"

He took his new anti-depressant today. I'm trying not to get too hopeful. Just because he took it today does not mean he will take it tomorrow. Does not mean he will come back to me. Does not mean things will be better.

He also came to be with me last night and didn't have anything to drink last night. He also watched Office Space with me. Again with the not wanting to get too hopeful... but I think he is taking my edict seriously.

In better news...
I finished my Sockapalooza socks and am almost ready to mail... I'd like to put a few more goodies in the mix. Alli, I really hope you like the socks. I had my friend try one on - she has the same size feet as you do - there is a lot of stretch to them and you can wash them. I'll be mailing them tomorrow whether I can run enough errands to get more stuff or not.
It seems so strange to me to be done with this after having it in the back of my head for so long. It was something I really looked forward to - but now I have Kerri's wedding shower and bachelorette party and wedding to prepare for. So there is always something.

School starts soon - Bean and I are both really looking forward to the new year. I feel refreshed after my summer of slug... ready to be organized and learn. Much different than I felt at the beginning of last year and quite the surprise after this summer. Despite my summer of slug, it has also been a serious summer of stress. I think that having so many of my friends in marital flux has helped - it's not just me.

Bean is going into 5th grade and is looking forward to being the oldest class. Last year I let her have very subtle highlights... this year I think we're both going to get a little funky. I still haven't given up my need for purple hair - and today's Talk of the Nation is about tattoos and I'm giving that some thought as well. I know, I know. You should never get bangs, a tattoo, or any kind of elective surgery while you're going through some king of mental or emotional distress. I know. I've wanted a tattoo since I was 16, I just can't decide on a design or placement. It's a big commitment. The only other thing I have ever given that much real commitment to is motherhood.

Tonight is the second S'n'B at my new, lovely LYS!! I'm going to be working on my Katie the intern socks as she is going back to school as well and her last day will be Saturday. I finally did the maths and started the heel flap, then there will be the rows and rows of stockinette for her teeny, tiny socks. I'm going to miss her. Anything more than competent makes me a little misty and she is absolutely more than competent. I told Andie today that we need to be sending her care packages at school so that when she graduates she'll want to join our news staff as her first job. She's meant for bigger markets than ours, but everyone has to have that "get your feet wet" first real job.

That's how much we love her.

So... I'll be posting pictures of my sock pal package, but only after I get the email from her that she got it. No sense in spoiling the surprise for her! (Hi Alli!)

Knit on!