Joyful Girl (and Jewelry!)

Apparently I am twelve years old... every time they talk about the bail-out today they say something about how they are looking at which of the bad assets to fund. And every time they say "bad asset" I have a Beavis moment: "Heh heh, she said bad ass on the radio."

Right, so about my joyfulness...
Joy is a choice. Happy is a choice. Positive thinking is a choice.
I know that sometimes it doesn't feel like it - you know that I have had my dark days (weeks, months) and there have been times when I appear only moderately functional. Joyfulness does not feel like an option during those times.
But it is.
It always is.
This week I had a couple of difficult moments... we hit the six-month point since Jeff died, and then there was the horrible Social Security office experience... and both times when I reached out for help Sally was there with encouragement and empathy and humor.
Her support made it possible to make it through the difficult stuff and come out smiling.

Am I "over it"? No. I will never be "over" the events of last two years. They have marked me in an indelible way. Changed some basic part of who I am and how I see the world.
So be it.
But if I allow these difficulties to diminish my joy there is nothing worth fighting for, nothing important enough to be worth this work.
And I know that is not true.

So that brings me to the jewelry.
I have been thinking about ordering a class ring. I wasn't interested in high school, and neither of my BA's made me want to commemorate the event... but I have worked really hard (in the middle of the ongoing shitstorm) and getting my Master's degree is really important to me. I have been looking at "traditional" class rings, but I also considered just buying a really nice ring as a "graduation present" to myself.
I have also been considering the benefits of wearing an ambiguous ring on my left hand...