It must have been Bad Larry's Pumpkin Blood Punch. Or maybe all of the chocolate... Or maybe I'm just tired and my inner joiner has taken over.

Whatever.

My friend Sally had a link to NaNoWriMo on her blog and I thought, "What the hell?" It's like, 6 pages a day (ack) starting at midnight tonight and ending November 30th. It's all about quantity and not so much about the quality. Cool, right?

And Bad Larry's Pumpkin Punch? Awesome. Seriously.
(Orange juice, pineapple juice, gin and triple sec. Uh huh. Yeah).

So what will my novel be about? I don't know. A large-ish woman with a sick husband who works too hard and eats too much crap? Now that's a compelling novel right there! Oh! And she sleeps a lot and complains about her life to anyone who doesn't run away! Now that's a likable character right there!

While we're on the subject of writing, the guy who wrote Little Children (Tom Perrotta) has a new novel out (The Abstinence Teacher). He was on some NPR program that I was listening to - probably Day to Day. Anyway, the interviewer brought up the fact that all of his books tend to focus on sex in the suburbs and asked if he believed in a happy marriage. He basically answered, sure but what's the story in that? The wedding is usually the end of the story and he said that his novel Little Children was sort of the "what comes next." Interesting. I liked the book and was surprised at how much I liked the movie... though the voice-over omniscient narrator was a little odd.

And while we're on the subject of good books... I'm reading The Almost Moon by Alice Sebold. Wow. It's uncomfortable but really good. The first line of this novel is, "When all is said and done, killing my mother came easily." I'm only half-way through this book, but frankly, the main character killing her mother is not the most uncomfortable part. And the writing is so freaking good. (For those of you hooked up with Zooba, that's where I got this book).

Well, the husband is feeling a little bit better, thanks to his new medication. I hope to be at Twist tomorrow night for Stitch and Bitch and then Friday is my book club. Saturday is my cousin's wedding and then Sunday I'm going to a movie with Lara. According to her blog I'm one of her favorite people.

So there.

And also, like Lara I might have accidentally ordered a few things on Etsy today. I'm planning ahead for my Winter Wonderland Coffee/Yarn Swap. I got some more coffee bean stitch markers and some coffee soap and also some coffee-dyed yarn from Shelly Kang - also known as Shelly The Heathen Housewife Shelly - AKA, my second favorite Shelly.

So all over blogland there were adorable pictures of children in homemade costumes, beaming with pride at the accomplishments of their mothers, just waiting to quietly make their way to a lovely Halloween party and/or Trick-or-Treating. My kid? She took an orange t-shirt and wrote on it with permanent marker. It reads, "What? This IS my costume. I'm the scariest thing you've ever seen!" Then tonight she wore a black stretchy dress and black footless tights and black fairy wings. She was my "Scary Fairy." I wore my PJ's and went as a 2-year-old because right now that's the scariest thing I can imagine. And I'm good "in character." Whining for chocolate comes naturally to me.

OK, kids. It's almost midnight... I have six pages to write in the next 24 hours. And also? I have to sleep, work, knit, read and deal with my family. No wonder I haven't written anything longer than a blog entry in fifteen years!

The Least Scary Thing

Of course, on Halloween.

The husband has gout. Not a barrel of fun, but also treatable and controllable. It's not Lupis, rheumatoid arthritis, or some kind of cancer.

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers...

Now, grant me patience and fortitude to clean the smoke smell out of my house.

Stillllll Waiting.

Still in pain, still grumpy, still smoking. You know, in my house.
I'm going to complain about him here... keep in mind that I do love him and I want him to feel better, but taking care of anyone who is in pain and grumpy and smoking in your house can get to you.
I stayed home with him again today - the people I work with are amazing. I did go in around 3 for an hour, but that was just to give myself a reason to shower. And I had to go to the grocery store.
It really is like having an infant again, he needs something about every two hours and I can't leave him alone.
And when I got to work it was so nice to see everyone... you know, everyone who did not need me to get them more water or empty their pee cup.
Too much?
Thought so.
Sorry.
It was nice to have grown-up conversations.
Better?

Anyway, he is now grumpier because the doctor's office did not call today. I am assuming that they did not get the labs back in as they hoped. He is assuming that he has cancer and she just didn't want to tell him. Those Cancer Treatment Center commercials? Also not helping.

I am clearly not designed for care taking.

In other news, my mother in law has clearly hit her head on something really hard. Yesterday she acknowledged that I have a second job and he has no job so therefore the fact that we are out of money has nothing at all to do with me and my spending habits.
Then she wrote us a big check. And also gave me cash to get dinner so that I wouldn't have to cook "after all I had been through." You know, taking him to the doctor and making sure they drew blood.

And by big check I mean two house payments and some yarn... just kidding (not really, I'll probably buy yarn). Two house payments and utilities and groceries. And yarn.

Well, regardless of what I spend the money on I can't say anything mean about her for at least another month.

I am going to work tomorrow... and then tomorrow night is Halloween, which I traditionally spend at Andie's house. I'll be there for at least a little bit, but depending on how he does all day by himself I might have to cut the evening short.
Ditto with Thursday knitting.

I hate waiting.

We're waiting on some potentially serious test results for the husband. He's been in a lot of pain for about a week and has been more or less unable to walk since Friday.

Consequently, he has also been SMOKING in the DEN which is making my entire house smell like ASS.
I am trying to maintain perspective on this.
It's a short-term solution and the non-smoking ban will go back in place as soon as he can hobble his own ass outside. I'm trying to think of it as a long, drawn-out party in which everyone I know is chain-smoking.

I am also going to be in trouble if it ever comes out that Febreeze causes any kind of illness.

His knee is huge and he did not fall or overtly injure in in any way. His knee is apparently on strike. His father was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis when he was this age so that is a scary possibility. There is also the possibility that he has some kind of immune deficiency. And that is sort of scary, too. He had x-rays and blood tests today. The x-rays were fine - she said there doesn't appear to be any fracture or breakdown in the structure of the bone. We should know more - if only about what it isn't tomorrow.

Neither of us slept much last night. It was so bad that every time he moved he would scream. We've been focusing on the immediate needs today - it took me an hour to get him out of the house. I was ready to call an ambulance and let the EMT's figure it out, but he was determined to get to the doctor's office on our own steam. Stubborn man.

My co-workers have been amazing. I didn't go in at all today and they really pulled together and made it work. I am so lucky in so many ways.

He's asleep now, and I'm going to Febreeze the living room once more and try to get some sleep, too.

Or I could spontaneously change my mind

I decided a few days ago that I was absolutely not going to join the Socks that Rock club again this year... and then on the way home I stopped and mailed in my registration form. Who knows why I do these things?

When I got home the October kit was here. Holy cats. I'm in love with the yarn and the pattern (and the shoes in the photograph). AND the yarn? It's called "Lenore" and is a preview of the Raven series that comes out on November 5th. (Side note: I had to memorize that poem in 7th grade and I remember most of it still. My favorite line, "And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain / Thrilled me - filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before").

There was also a flier for the next BMFA sock camp. Sigh. I know we went through all of my stomping around about wanting to go last year... but I really really really want to go this year. The Yarn Harlot is going to be there, for the love of all things soft and wooly!
Last year Lara pointed out how much sock yarn one could purchase with that kind of money... but I need a vacation! And wouldn't that be a fun one?!?
On the other hand... there is that one little fly in the honey (burr in the roaving?) - and not just that given our current financial situation spending that kind of money is stupid and irresponsible. My social anxiety levels are higher than usual right now. While the thought of a great, yarn-filled vacation makes me happy, there is also this sense of doom at the thought of spending 5 days in a strange state with 80 people I don't know. What if I freak out? Or fall down. Or get that nervous talking thing and can't stop myself. What if I sweat on someone or throw up? What if they don't like me?

The only thing that is getting me through the pledge drive is that I spend most of my time in the safe, darkened cave of the control room and I don't actually have to interact with the people much. Also, I'm too tired and grumpy to worry about anything embarrassing that I might say or do. That and all of the sugar.

Speaking of the pledge drive... when I'm pitching I often refer back to the last thing they talked about and bring up the fact that we all listen and then go right online to look up the book/cd/movie they mentioned. In Talk of the Nation today they were talking about porn. Online porn. Free. Online. Porn. Starting that break with "How many of you are online right now looking that up? While you're online, make a pledge to this station!" seemed... wrong somehow. Realistic, but wrong. Pretty much anything we usually say seems wrong when they're talking about free online porn.

"Think about what it means to you to have this kind of information..."
"What a great example of the quality programming and important information..."
"Finding human connections and learning more about people all over the world is just one reason public radio is so important..."

See what I mean?

Woo Hoo!

I had a package waiting for me this morning!!

Thank you Lisa for being so generous!! Do you see that pretty sock yarn?!? There are even a few little things in there for Bean. The Snickers quickly became breakfast... every day should begin with presents. Especially during Pledge Drive!!


Here is a better picture of the washcloth... The colors are beautiful and the soap is lavender. Loooooooove it!! She did such a nice job and it really did make my day! Thanks again Lisa!!







While we're on the topic of swaps... here's the Monkey Swap package just before I sent it. It was been received and she reports that the socks fit!!


I love these swaps!! I have as much fun getting the package together to send as I do opening the packages I receive!!

One Good Hour

I am exhausted... trying not to be whiny or anything.
My sinus infection turned cold exacerbated by allergies is kicking my ass. Completely.

Last night I couldn't sleep so I watched (what I thought was) the rest of Lost Season 3... apparently the last four or five episodes are not online yet. Damn it. I went to sleep around 5, slept for a few hours and then the husband woke me up. For sex. Riiiiiiight. He said, "I thought you were getting up at 8." I rolled over and said, "Well, that didn't happen." Then I moved his hand, tucked my blankets more fully around me and said, "And this? Not happening either." Poor guy.
Whatever.

Then work. Pledge drive. Day five. Everyone exhausted and on high alert and full of carbs and coffee. We have about $5o thousand to raise in the next four days. That is not as insurmountable as it sounds.

My one good hour started just before 4... Shelly came in and pitched with me. What a blast! I learned that what is keeping me from marrying her and living in the back of her yarn store is not the fact that we are both married. It is not the fact that marriage between two women is not legal in this state. It is not even the fact that I am pretty certain that Shelly is, you know, straight and all. It's that we were separated at birth and are, in fact, twins.

The rest is downhill and way too boring to type. Though I did make a kick-ass macaroni and cheese.

I should be baking now... those cakes are not going to bake themselves after all. But I think I'll wait and bake my boobies tomorrow.
Right now I'm going to take some NyQuil and sleepsleepsleep.